PO Box 306, Glasgow, G21 2AE, Scotland
Dear NTV,
Celtic's turnover is now in the region of £70m per annum, most of which comes from cash spent by the supporters. Given this financial input from the fans (customers?) is it not about time that the club spent some cash on improvements in and around the stadium which would directly benefit us? A little bit spent each year would soon accumulate and would go a long way to making Celtic Park a far more attractive place to visit.
A simple first step would be to get the scoreboard at the Rangers End of the ground working. This hasn't worked this season. Why not? At a time when money has been spent improving the 'executive' facilities in the main stand this sends out a clear message about where the supporters stand with regard to the directors' priorities.
Why can't the coach park and the new walkway round the back of the Celtic End be covered with tarmac? Perhaps the board believe that the ordinary supporter doesn't mind if he/she gets their footwear covered in water and mud either accessing or exiting the stadium?
In addition why can't the club finance the building of new toilets beside the bus park so those who have travelled large distances to get to the stadium can at least spend a penny (in addition to the considerably larger sums they spend in the superstore) when they get here?
How about putting more Televisions into the concourses of the stands so that all the supporters have the chance to watch the highlights?
Long term why can't the club finance the building of a social club in the spare ground behind the Celtic End? This could be a place of 'Welcome' to supporters especially those travelling from further afield.
How about buying some of the spare land round the ground and utilising it for secure car parking? Improving the facilities for the 'ordinary' supporter might make us all feel that the club value us for more than the cash we spend.
Nobody expects all these projects to happen in the next 12 months but gradual improvement of the facilities in and around the stadium, year on year, would help cement the bond between the support and the club. It would be rather hypocritical for the board to express concern about the potential cost of these improvements at a time when many players are being paid more in a week, than the majority of us receive in a year, in many cases for sitting on the bench rather than playing. These improvements would be of long term benefit and should be started as soon as possible.
CAPABILITY
GREEN
Edinburgh
bad press
Dear NTV,
Celtic gets a bad press. But nobody should be mystified as to where it's coming from.
Imagine you're in the business of selling newspapers in Scotland. You do the arithmetic: there's 16% on one side and about 80% on the other. So which side do you please? Now, that's a no-brainer if ever there was one. Maybe that explains why you'll never see any criticism of why Rangers tolerate Nazi salutes at Ibrox, the militaristic music broadcast from their PA or the close business links between Murray and McLelland before McLelland became chairman.
No, that would require honesty and the Scottish press don't do honesty. It much prefers, for example, to fly out a Murray mouthpiece to bait Martin O'Neill on the eve of an important European tie. It just would not happen to Rangers, but the Record got its distorted little story from its very own sad distorted little man.
THE PRINCE
OF PEACE
Greenock
sing yer hearts out for the bhoys
Dear NTV,
I'm following with interest the story that the board are considering taking steps to implement the designation of a so-called singing section in are 141 of the Jock Stein Stand. While I'd like to hope that this idea might eventually see the light of day and actually accomplish its objective of helping to create a better atmosphere around Celtic Park for SPL games, I fear that if the corporate shills employed by the directors have anything to do with, it is doomed to failure.
The very thought of relinquishing control of what happens inside the stadium to a large number of fans must have Brian Quinn and the rest waking up in a cold sweat. I can only picture the scene the first time there's a spontaneous rendition from the designated singers of anything not officially sanctioned by those in charge.
And would it be possible to be chucked out for not singing at all?
My lack of faith in officialdom to organise such spontaneity (I do hope they see the paradox as well) derives partly from previous abysmal attempts to stage manage their version of atmosphere, mainly through their weapon of choice, the appalling DJ. Are we to be subjected to even more of him contriving to get the singers wound up? It would be a merciful release if we weren't. This is the guy who managed to kill the atmosphere before the Barcelona game stone dead.
And therein lies my point. Nobody can have any complaints about the atmosphere for the vast majority of Champions League and UEFA Cup matches at Celtic Park. Compared with the SPL, there is something meaningful at stake and the result is usually in doubt right up until the end of the game. Give us more of this stuff and the whole ground will be a singing section.
As for where the singing section should be located, there's a bunch of old codgers who sit in the middle of the South Stand who never sing. Most of the time they don't wear any colours either. Turf them all out and get the singing mob in there. If they're going to risk all kinds of pulmonary complications by bellowing their lungs out for the best part of two hours on a winter's afternoon then they deserve the best seats in the house anyway.
Yours in Celtic,
DAVID PATERSON
Glasgow
d'oh!
Dear NTV,
There I was all set to send my application away to join the swingers in section 141 of the Jock Stein Stand, absolutely drooling with anticipation of all kinds of debauchery only to discover that I hadn't read the Celtic View properly and that it was a 'singing' section they were thinking of starting and not, as I had hoped, a 'sinning' section.
CHARLES
MANSON
Maryhill
nancho man
Dear NTV,
I'm not sure quite what to make of this, but it seems that the Huns' latest exponent of the beautiful game (and I'm not talking football here) has a day job. This is none other than Nacho, aka 'Nancho' Novo, star of Bergmanesque Spanish films such as 'The Red Squirrel' and 'Lovers of the Arctic circle'.
Writing of Novo's magnum opus, 'Lovers of the Arctic Circle, Movie-reviews ( http://movie-reviews.colossus.net/movies/l/lovers_arctic.html ) states 'In a voiceover, Otto remarks that if a ball had been kicked straight, he wouldn't have chased it, and if he hadn't run after it, he never would have encountered Ana. Throughout the film, coincidence builds upon coincidence. By acknowledging it, however, director Medem keeps us from shaking our heads and muttering, 'Give me a break!''. I know how he feels.'
I recognize the reference to 'Nancho' not being able to kick straight. The coincidences are probably analogous to the coincidence of Nancho being surprisingly able to kick opponents up the backside, get sent off, and have his red card rescinded in time for the Celtic game.
Interestingly, the rather knowledgeable Channel 4 website (http://www.channel4.com/film/reviews/person.jsp?id=34204) has not rated 'Nancho' at all, something it shares with 95% of those who have seen him play.
Do any other NTV readers have any news on 'Nancho's' ongoing film career? I suspect that he has moved to Ibrox for a remake of John Huston's epic football film Escape to Victory, where a group of stranded footballers escape from a Nazi prison camp. Round up the usual suspects
TOM PARKHILL
Bath
a surrealist writes
Dear NTV,
Recently, and for reasons that would take too long to explain (honest) I found myself in possession of a copy of 'Souness: The Management Years'.
After a quick shufti of the contents I decided to opt for the chapter entitled 'Le Petit Merde and Carsten Janker', or something like that. This particular part of the book was apparently written in order to quash the rumour that Souness didn't get on with everyone's favourite Ranger (c. A. McCoist). I'll assume that it would be in breach of copyright if I was to quote the passage word for word, but one 'hilarious' anecdote concerns Ally and a cardboard cutout of Andy Gray (who was absent most of the time as he stayed in the Midlands). Anyway, Ally placed this thing in the corner of the dressing-room and - wait for it - would talk to it every morning for several minutes, as Souness says, 'never a dull moment with Ally around', although I think obviously this was a 'you really had to have been there' moment.
It progresses on to Souness virtually calling him a dud and, sure enough, for the next few weeks the rest of the players christened him Dudley. Comic genius or what?
He goes on to inform us that if Super Ally was in his office for a rollicking he would soon be reduced to tears of laughter as McCoist recounted tales of his previous night's exploits (being breathalysed by Strathclyde's finest perhaps?).
Quickly losing the will to live I put the book down at this point. Now that Ally has found himself on the wrong end of a divorce settlement perhaps he can release a book of his own revealing his unique brand of humour (anyone remember his 'Louvre?' 'I had to Des I was bursting', joke at France '98? Didn't think so.)
MELVYN
BRAGG
c/o The Bodlean Library