hackwatching

missing footage from the stv vaults and the grilling of gordon strachan

editorial bias at STV

Surely there couldn't be a hint of bias at STV, the organisation that started the TV careers of such media giants as Jim White and Gerry McNee?

I ask this due to a subtle spin that appears to have been applied to recent transfer activity in the SPL. When a news bulletin reports that a player is being transferred to a new club, it is customary to show a snippet of the player in action to enlighten the audience to the prowess of the player in question. Usually the clip shows the player scoring a goal or some other display of skill that shows him in a positive light.

As you can imagine then, I was slightly bewilidered when the report on the evening edition of the STV news concerning Kenny Miller signing for Celtic, carried a clip of the player missing an open goal for Rangers at Ibrox.

I couldn't quite understand why this would be an appropriate film to accompany the report and had to scold myself for a relapse of paranoia and for thinking it could be malicious reporting to make Celtic and the player look daft. Clearly a ludicrous notion.

However the relapse became a full blown diagnosis, when, on another occasion, the same channel STV chose to show a clip of Dion Dublin missing a penalty to complement their report on him signing for Celtic.

The conclusion must be that of the thousands of hours of football coverage STV hold in their archives they could only find film of these guys making arses of themselves. Either that, or STV is full of people who have an agenda where Celtic is concerned.

What option do you think carries the shorter odds?

I await with beginnigless anticipation for the clip of Derek Riordan missing an easy chance in front of goal if the boy ever actually gets round to signing on at the Govan Shityards.

the times ain't a-changin'

In the Evening Times edition of February 6th Feb, a hackette called Alison McConnell seemed to be making her play for Darrell King's crown as top bluenose of the puddin' race. With the Huns getting a hard time elsewhere in the blat for the weekend's hopeless result against Hibs, the general shiteness of their manager and David Murray's hot air about the many players they were going to sign in January, they therefore had to dig up something negative about Celtic to 'balance' things out, a long-time speciality of the Laptop Loyal.

What she came up with was - 'STRACHAN TO FACE FAN QUIZ' (presumably about why we were just the 8 points ahead in the league at the time) - which to people with an average IQ meant that the Celtic manager was going to take questions from fans on a live phone-in for an hour.

I can't help but think that if the TFOD had come up with a similar idea, it might have been portrayed in a slightly more positive light (i.e. Big Eck reaches out to fans, Big Eck tries to give fans answers, Big Eck - give me my seventh last chance to get a result against Celtic etc. etc.)

Anyway, the blurb in quesion opens as follows: 'The Hoops boss will face the fans in a live phone-in at 7pm and can expect to be grilled over recent transfer activity (at least there has been some - unlike at Mordor!) and below-par performances (only winning 2-1 in a semi-final I suppose, rather than getting gubbed 3-0 at home).'

Now, I know Celtic fans are used to tittle-tattle and half truths spun in a certain way to reflect negatively on the club, but even a paranoiac like me was surprised by the blatant whopper that came next: '...and the failure of the club to secure a long-term signing'.

Now I know they aren't exactly Ronaldinho and Allessandro Nesta, but didn't Celtic sign Mark WIlson on a four and a half year contract? And is Kenny Miller not coming on a three year deal in the summer?

So what exactly is a 'long-term contract' according to the Evening Times? A Jim McLean 10 year special?!

Much better to sign someone like, say, Mladenovic, perhaps, on a four year deal and then fail to flog him on the cheap when you find out he's a dud - or Gavin Rae and pay him for being injured for two years.

The article then goes on to mention Chris Sutton and Agathe leaving - more or less brands Dublin as a diddy signing - we haven't got a left-back - we couldn't afford a bid for Riordan - and after Stan's contract we'll never be able to afford another good player again.

Nothing like a nice balanced article to deflect attention from the Huns when their season's in the shitter!

TONY BANANAS