Mystery man appears in Rangers team picture shocker

WORLD EXCLUSIVE
By Archie McBooze

The football world was rocked to its foundations yesterday following the hoax perpetrated on the Manchester United team in Munich by an interloper when a mystery man appeared in the Rangers team picture.

Laughing and joking with the rest of the players, the stranger took his place unnoticed at the end of the group before being pointed out by the photographers.

His identity was later revealed as a Mr. Max Schreck, the horror actor best known for his role as Nosferatu the Vampire in the FW Murnau film of the same name.

A spokesman for the Rangers first team revealed exclusively to the Bugle yesterday that the players themselves were unaware that they had a scary monster in their midst because he blended in so well with the rest of the squad. "We all thought it was Jorg Albertz", he said.

Steven Spielberg is 52.

Above: Mystery interloper Max Schreck. everybody assumed he was a member of the first team squad.

Albertz hits out at Celtic league win

EXCLUSIVE
by Findlay Donald

Jorg Albertz rocked the football world to its foundations yesterday by claiming that Rangers should have won the league instead of Celtic.

"They only won the league because they're better than everybody else", said the German non-international. "It's not fair."

"They should be glad that second place gets into the Champions League", added 'The Hammer', "Because look who came second. Oh, it's us. Schweinhund!"

Leni Riefestahl is 97.

New t-shirt controversy erupts

exclusive
by Findlay Findlay

The Rangers first team squad provoked a storm of controversy at their final home league game of the season when they emerged onto the Ibrox pitch wearing t-shirts bearing the slogan "premier League Runners-Up 2000-01, here's all the excuses."

The reverse of the t-shirts carried a long list of excuses for the Ibrox side's failure to win the league championship this season followed by the cryptic message 'smell our shorts'.

Dick advocaat was standing by his players last night, although he was also muttering something about fat necks at the same time.

Rangers superstore end of season sale

books
Winning With Rangers by Tore Andre Flo was £13.99 now 20p

The Big Book of Excuses by Dick Advocaat was £13.99 now 10p

Also available
Champions 2001 balloons (very burst) 10p each