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briefs

If this TV schedule is anything to go by it seems as though if we're not going to be allowed into the English Premiership then the English Premiership will just have to come to us (Sky Sports 1, 5.30pm). Also, look who's appearing in the Live Saturday Fight Night at 7.45!	Spotted in the News of the Screws beside the adverts for adult sex toys, soft porn videos, underwear fetish catalogues and Gerry McNee's column, the very thing to revive the Ibrox title challenge. A headline from the front page of the Daily Mirror of November 1943 (the main story was "Rommel routed, Huns fleeing in disorder") discovered in an attic by a relative of NTV reader John Sherry who points out that although it's nearly 60 years old, as far as the Huns are concerned, what goes around comes around.
The shocking truth behind George McCluskey's departure from Celtic as revealed in the Match Weekly Soccer Yearbook of 1984, which might go some way to explaining his Happy Mondays pose in the accompanying picture.	Another addition to our Celtic library is "The Celtic World" by the appropriately named Miranda Green, which is billed as, "A vivid picture of Celtic life ... based on archaeological evidence and classical commentaries." Not having read it yet we cannot confirm that the archaeological evidence consists of a fossilised sports jacket once worn by Arthur Montford on Scotsport and that one of the classical commentaries referred to went something like, "What a stramash... out in front... Dalglish... Goal!! What a pass... what a goal... what a game!"

Not wishing to encourage this sort of thing on the grounds that it's childish and downright peurile, we would urge all our readers to avoid the above Rangers calendar currently doing the rounds on the internet. Not only is it degrading, it is also an insult to the people concerned to insinuate that they look anything like their Ibrox doppelgangers. It is also gratuitously cruel to feature Bert Konterman as himself.
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