O'Neill is still our Blessed Martin (at least for another season)

Are we never to be allowed to bask in the reflected glory of a league championship win for the duration of an entire close season in peace? I mean, it's only a few weeks after all, yet it seems nigh on impossible to relax knowing that, despite all evidence to the contrary, crisis and turmoil are just a tabloid late night edition away.

Ever since the Perm parted with the Bunnet and sales of the ragtops rocketed, the pattern seems to have been set.

Last year it was a double whammy. Hot on the heels of a glorious treble, manager Martin O'Neill was bound for Old Trafford to replace Alex Ferguson and Henrik Larsson was about to join Walter Smith at Everton, a story so far fetched it had JK Rowling contemplating adding it to chapter 5 of her latest book ("Harry Potter and the Tabloids of Pish").

This year there was a vacancy at Elland Road and the hacks were able to dust off last year's copy, change the names where appropriate and retire to the lounge for a few snifters.

Scottish football might be wallowing in a slough of despond, with the telly money having dried up and clubs queuing up for appointments with the liquidators, but when it comes to selling papers nothing beats a good old Celtic story. The reprise of the "He's Off" sketch has once again demonstrated that the hacks will write whatever they like and it will be greedily devoured then regurgitated by the panic-stricken in newspaper hotlines and radio station phone-ins.

O'Neill's spat with the Guardian last year when he sued the paper over their reports that he'd had secret meetings with the Manchester United board might keep the tabloids on their toes, but ultimately they've been as bad as ever this summer. Not only was O'Neill reported to be on his way (again) but some of the more febrile among the Fourth Estate also had ready made replacments lined up in the likes of Mick McCarthy, Guus Hiddink (again) and even Wim Jansen (again).

MON finally refuted the Leeds stories. But even that wasn't enough. Leeds, we were reliably informed, had appointed Terry Venables as an interim caretaker until MON is free to take the job. If El Tel wins the English Premiership it'll be interesting to hear the Leeds board as they push him out the door in favour of the Blessed Martin.

Under the circumstances it's little wonder O'Neill becomes exasperated with the Scottish media. Every utterance becomes loaded with the kind of significance once only bestowed on Bertrand Russell. No comments are imbued with almost as much weight. He doesn't even have to say anything to get the keyboards clicking away furiously.

As the Retard's chief reporter once famously said on Sportsound, "It's not so much what Martin O'Neill said in that interview, it's what he didn't say." Is it only here you can find hacks able to fill loads of column inches or ten minutes of air time on the subject of what someone hasn't said?

Thus, when O'Neill says in response to questions about his longer-term future "Nothing is forever", the words are pored over as if they had just been uttered by Rene Descarts.

"There seemed only one interpretation for writers to place on his use of the phrase," wrote Michael Grant in the Sunday Herald, "From the content of yesterday's statement it would be reasonable to infer that it may be a matter of when not if O'Neill eventually returns to manage in the Premiership."

There surely is only one interpretation, because it's a simple statement of fact. So thanks, Mr. Grant, for your insight, but I think we could probably have worked that out for ourselves.

Only slightly more crass than the attempt to crank up the heat in the tabloid circulation wars by splashing sensationalist stories almost calculated to destabilise Celtic are the pathetic attempts at justifying rotten and lazy reporting by claiming the interests of Celtic fans are behind everything, like this from Euan McLean in the Mason: "Celts could have scored 100 (against Shelbourne) and it still wouldn't make the fans forget the dark cloud of uncertainty hanging over Parkhead. Supporters are not stupid but the gaffer has treated them as if they are, first by dodging the issue of Leeds' interest for a week then patronising them with attempted reassurances that fail on every counts (sic)... The shambolic excuse for a press conference denied the press the chance to ask O'Neill the questions every fan wants and DESERVES to know... For seven days he played hide and seek with the press who wanted answers for every Hoops fan... He scurried from a reporter in Tokyo... then dodged requests for interviews on his return home."

Then there is the ridiculous notion put forward by Keith Jackson, amongst others, that on the eve of a season which holds the possibility of qualification for the Champions League the board should sack the manager on the grounds that he hasn't signed an extension to his contract and that it's better to get some money by way of compensation before his present deal runs out, or this, equally lunatic assertion from Pat Sheehan in the Sun, who, incidentally, assures us with confidence that Martin O'Neill has already knocked back a new four year deal: "The gambler's final ace has hit the table in the high stakes poker game of Who Dares Wins. Martin O'Neill's refusal to sign an extension to his contract as manager of Celtic has dared the board to sack him."

Anyone who is indulging in MON staying forever fantasies would do well to leave the next few paragraphs out. O'Neill will eventually leave Celtic. That's for sure. And, no matter how shocking a revelation, and despite the fact that it might be heresy to speak of a semi-deity in such terms, he is not irreplacable. Anyone who was willing to bestow legend status on Wim Jansen and contemplate throwing themselves off the Kingston Bridge at the thought of his impending departure will testify to that.

O'Neill is quite right to point out that the days of managers and players staying at a club for years are a thing of the past. Whereas for most of us the two certainties in life are death and taxes, for a football manager you can add the sack. Even Jock Stein was forced out of a job in the end.

Public opinion can be a fickle jade at the best of times. In the clamour for OFM to sign an extension to his contract this should be borne in mind, together with the fact that these days contracts mean virtually nothing.

O'Neill is bomb proof of course. If nothing else, the speculation surrounding his departure for Leeds United has merely served to strengthen his hand if it is a game of brinkmanship. What he's looking for is anybody's guess. More money to buy players? More money for himself? Security of tenure? If it was simply a case of throwing money at the team in order to win the league again the Dick Advocaat would still be downstairs instead of upstairs.

What is worrying is the manager's seeming indifference to strategic planning. When he says "What is the point of planning for four years down the way when that doesn't happen?", you can only hope that this is an attitude not shared by those on the board and that there are people on the coaching staff who don't take such a short-term view of things.

If he is off at the end of his contract next year, well, so be it. He never said otherwise and he'll leave having written his own brilliant chapter in Celtic's history, with the gratitude of all of us.

When it does come, we can only hope that the board have time enough to appoint a successor worthy of the job.

But the only person who really knows exactly how long he'll stick around Celtic Park is Martin O'Neill and, for the time being at least, he looks as if he's enjoying keeping that particular wee secret to himself.

MARMADUKE BAGLEHOLE

Back to top